15
Jul
When I was little, I remember spending a lot of time outside in nature. I had a small yard but back then it seemed like a massive jungle for my little mind to explore. Beside our home, was a shrub full of ladybugs. I loved them. One day, I was sitting in the grass across the yard from the shrub and I found a lady bug all alone. I remember feeling sad and having a deep desire to help this little bug - so I did. I gently stuck my hand out and waited patiently for the lady bug to crawl onto me. Once she was safely in my hand I carefully carried her back to her “home,” the shrub. It made me so happy that I started hunting for misplaced  lady bugs to return home. It became a habit, and day after day I would make a point to spend time on my mission to save the lady bugs. Well, let’s be realistic, I was a kid so this probably only lasted for a week or so. And in retrospect, the lady bugs were probably relieved that this annoying kid FINALLY stopped interrupting their lives. But at 5 yrs old I’m pretty sure I believed I was doing these bugs a great service… like I was Mother friggin’ Theresa of my backyard! Actually, at that age I probably had no clue who Mother Theresa was.

Anywaayyyyys…

My point here is this… Somewhere along the way I “grew up.” I lost the sensitivity I had as a little 5 year old girl trying to save lady bugs. 

Why? At some stage of my evolution I started to believe that being sensitive was the equivalent of being weak.

WHAaa..?? Really? Being sensitive, a real human being, makes me weak? Who in the hell taught me that one?

Moral of the story?

SAVE THE LADY BUGS!!!

Juuuussssst kiiidddddingg…

HONOUR YOUR SENSITIVITY, DAMMIT!! 

When I finally learned this lesson (and, I’m still working on it), I freed up an incredible amount of energy. It feels good to be real! Who knew…

“Millions of people have decided not to be sensitive. They have grown thick skins around themselves just to avoid being hurt by anybody. But it is at great cost. Nobody can hurt them, but nobody can make them happy either.” ~Osho

In happiness and health,

A.

When I was little, I remember spending a lot of time outside in nature. I had a small yard but back then it seemed like a massive jungle for my little mind to explore. Beside our home, was a shrub full of ladybugs. I loved them. One day, I was sitting in the grass across the yard from the shrub and I found a lady bug all alone. I remember feeling sad and having a deep desire to help this little bug - so I did. I gently stuck my hand out and waited patiently for the lady bug to crawl onto me. Once she was safely in my hand I carefully carried her back to her “home,” the shrub. It made me so happy that I started hunting for misplaced lady bugs to return home. It became a habit, and day after day I would make a point to spend time on my mission to save the lady bugs. Well, let’s be realistic, I was a kid so this probably only lasted for a week or so. And in retrospect, the lady bugs were probably relieved that this annoying kid FINALLY stopped interrupting their lives. But at 5 yrs old I’m pretty sure I believed I was doing these bugs a great service… like I was Mother friggin’ Theresa of my backyard! Actually, at that age I probably had no clue who Mother Theresa was.

Anywaayyyyys…

My point here is this… Somewhere along the way I “grew up.” I lost the sensitivity I had as a little 5 year old girl trying to save lady bugs.

Why? At some stage of my evolution I started to believe that being sensitive was the equivalent of being weak.

WHAaa..?? Really? Being sensitive, a real human being, makes me weak? Who in the hell taught me that one?

Moral of the story?

SAVE THE LADY BUGS!!!

Juuuussssst kiiidddddingg…

HONOUR YOUR SENSITIVITY, DAMMIT!!

When I finally learned this lesson (and, I’m still working on it), I freed up an incredible amount of energy. It feels good to be real! Who knew…

“Millions of people have decided not to be sensitive. They have grown thick skins around themselves just to avoid being hurt by anybody. But it is at great cost. Nobody can hurt them, but nobody can make them happy either.” ~Osho

In happiness and health, A.
13
Jun
I pulled this card today from Doreen Virtue’s Ascended Masters deck. It’s a great reminder for me as I continue my journey to learning the art of self-care. 
When it comes to this whole “nurture yourself” business, I’m basically in kindergarten. For one, when it comes to food and exercise, I fall on the side of extreme. When I’m on, I go to the point of burnout, and when I’m off, good luck trying to get me to stop… yah, you know what? I don’t think I ‘m going to admit to all the stupid shit I do when I’m off.
Secondly, when it comes to sleep, I’m a spaz and can’t get that under control either. (*Point of Awareness #1 - trying to get it “under control” is probably a problem in itself).
I do take time to myself, but I spend that time feeling guilty that I’m not working and getting shit done. I blame that on spending the first part of my life in Catholic school. Those Catholics are all about guilt. Just kidding… no, I’m not. 
But seriously, whenever I try to “nurture” myself there always seems to be a nagging feeling that lingers and tells me I should be doing something else. (*Point of Awareness #2 - I feel the need to put the word “nurture” in quotations because the word in itself is a little lame and makes me uncomfortable).
Like I said.. I’m in self-care kindergarten. Got some pointers? How do you nurture yourself guilt-free? 
In happiness and health,
A.

I pulled this card today from Doreen Virtue’s Ascended Masters deck. It’s a great reminder for me as I continue my journey to learning the art of self-care. 

When it comes to this whole “nurture yourself” business, I’m basically in kindergarten. For one, when it comes to food and exercise, I fall on the side of extreme. When I’m on, I go to the point of burnout, and when I’m off, good luck trying to get me to stop… yah, you know what? I don’t think I ‘m going to admit to all the stupid shit I do when I’m off.

Secondly, when it comes to sleep, I’m a spaz and can’t get that under control either. (*Point of Awareness #1 - trying to get it “under control” is probably a problem in itself).

I do take time to myself, but I spend that time feeling guilty that I’m not working and getting shit done. I blame that on spending the first part of my life in Catholic school. Those Catholics are all about guilt. Just kidding… no, I’m not. 

But seriously, whenever I try to “nurture” myself there always seems to be a nagging feeling that lingers and tells me I should be doing something else. (*Point of Awareness #2 - I feel the need to put the word “nurture” in quotations because the word in itself is a little lame and makes me uncomfortable).

Like I said.. I’m in self-care kindergarten. Got some pointers? How do you nurture yourself guilt-free? 

In happiness and health,

A.

8
Jun
The insomniac brain is a sort of conspiracy theorist, believing too much in its own paranoiac importance - as though if it were to blink, then doze, the world might be overrun by some encroaching calamity, which its obsessive musings are somehow fending off.
— Jonathan Lethem
7
Jun
Amen, Kelly Cutrone, … Amen.

Amen, Kelly Cutrone, … Amen.

6
Jun
The darkest hour comes right before the dawn.
— The Alchemist